Some days, you’re just not feeling it. You might be feeling tired, sad and unmotivated. Other days you start off feeling great but the wheels seem to fall off: you get stuck in traffic, something goes wrong at work, or you have a fight with a significant other.
The Only Thing You Can Do
There will always be things in your life that you can’t control. What you can control is your response. The quicker that you can bring some intention to your response the quicker you can get your day back into a positive shape.
Each time something goes in a way that you’d prefer it didn’t is an opportunity to practise taking control of your response.
Getting to the point where you label things as an opportunity rather than “bad”, is great. But even if you choose to see something as “bad”, you can choose not to let that wreck your whole day. As long as you can approach whatever is going on with perspective, you can encapsulate it into half-an-hour, or an hour.
There’s absolutely nothing to be gained by labelling your whole day as bad. We can easily get lost in the familiarity of each day and become irritated, upset and angry but situations. But those small irritants would generally be obliterated if something far more impacting appeared. So why not obliterate them as soon as you can and carry on to appreciate the joy of the day?
Dropping into your body and feeling the physiology is always useful. Whether that’s nausea, a tightness in your chest, teariness or whatever uncomfortable feelings show up in your body. Accepting it is quickest way of releasing it.
Then, once you’re feeling better reflect on what’s going on for you. What do you want and what control do you have in the situation? What can you do to make the situation better?
It could be as simple as letting your fears and anxiety over whatever has happened go. Fears may be imaginings of the future that will never happen, but they can also be valid concerns that are worth investigating further.
An important thing to remember here is that you will always be in a better space to deal with the situation when you aren’t in a state of overstress. When your body is overstressed your ability to be productive and make sound choices is reduced.
One of the most unproductive, debilitating things you can do when it feels like your day has turned to custard, is to turn on yourself. Dr William Glasser says all psychological issues are relationship issues but it’s easy to forget that your relationship with yourself is the most important of all.
- Rewarding or bribing to control
Practising the caring habits on yourself, especially when your day isn’t showing up the way you want it to, is one the most useful things you can do.
- Negotiating differences
How can you support yourself when you day is less than perfect?
- I subscribe to a few YouTube Channels that I feel supported by. One is Fairyland Cottage, and in the clip, I’ve embedded here for you she talks about being your own best friend by using caring habits.
- Take some form of gentle exercise (preferably your favourite kind). This helps generate natural feel-good hormones in your body.
- Remember to be grateful for all that you have. It might sound like a cliche but if you can remember to feel grateful for all the positives in your life you will also improve your body chemistry.
- “This too will pass.” Life is a rich tapestry of highs, lows, and everything in between. We tend to forget that and continually be searching for the highs. Accepting the lows, remembering that they won’t be a permanent fixture, not only allows them to move through but also builds resilience.
- Do something nice for someone else. The 365give is a whole program based on how giving to others helps your own wellbeing.
- Intersperse all your “must-do jobs” with “joyful jobs”. When you have a challenging day there can be a tendency to go harder at your “to-do list”. Try taking a different route and intersperse all the things you have to get done with things that bring you joy. When your energy and wellbeing are low you’re probably not going to be particularly productive. When you can get yourself feeling better you’ll be able to tackle your “to-do list” with much more efficiency and enthusiasm.
How to Deal with Stress and Anxiety Effectively
If you’re in a situation where bad days are outweighing good days you might consider doing our online stress and Anxiety course.
Thanks for reading, I hope this post helps keep “bad” moments from turning into “bad days”. Leaving me a comment will certainly make my day.